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I kinda hate the word "Positive"

Last Summer, I completed my master's degree from the University of Missouri.  I finished it in 1 years' time; August 2016 to August 2017. It was a big undertaking, extremely challenging but incredibly satisfying to be able to say that I have a graduate degree in school and educational counseling psychology with an emphasis in positive coaching

I just wish that it was called something different because I kinda hate the word positive 

I don't hate being positive; just the word. The reason that I hate it is because when most people hear the words "positive coaching" they immediately are like " oh, so you teach your athletes how to be happy and smile all the time?" Or that as a coach I have this hakkuna matta  style where it doesn’t  matter if my guys (inclusive term) win or not, it just mattered that they participated blah blah blah blah


Nope. None of that is true.


In fact, if you ask some of the fighters or competitors that I've worked with over the years, I'm funny and nice but I can also be demanding and blunt. As much as I want to make training a good experience, not everyone is always smiling and happy...  but even if they were, that’s not what I see as positivity at its truest form

To me, positivity in its truest form isn't ignoring all of the bad things that are happening around you, it's anticipating them, expecting them, and then KNOWING you can get through them; that's real positivity.


When I first started competing, I knew that I was going to lose some matches. Granted, I didn’t it was going to take 10 years to win 1 freakin match,  but I KNEW in my heart  that if I kept going I would eventually win  but do you know how hard it was to lose and have all of these people come up to you and tell you that winning, something that matters  a lot to me, doesn’t matter and that the only thing that does is that I was an inspiration and they wanted to take pictures and stuff?  seriously, the easy thing for me to do would have been to do what I wanted to do, what the competitor in me wanted to do and that’s say "please just leave me the F alone" … the hard thing was shaking hands, smiling, and saying "thank you" but I did it because I knew one day I would be doing it after a win and all the losses would be worth it.


Even today, if I'm being honest, there is not a practice or a training session where, If I sat and thought about it, I wouldn’t break down crying because of an instance where my brain and my body didn’t match up and I couldn't do something that I wanted to. Instead, I anticipate the struggle and I choose to focus on the things that I did well. The same can be said for me professionally, I have a very clear vision for my life and where I want to be, it's so clear, that Its almost tangible, I can almost touch it but I'm not there yet..

Is it frustrating?


What most people think of when the hear the word "positive" but i actually think its something pretty different

Yes, Very.


The key is to anticipate the frustration, acknowledge the frustration, work while being frustrated and  truly BELIVING  that one day all of that work and frustration  will pay off and you will have achieved everything you knew was possible

THAT is a truly, authentically, positive mindset.

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